A listener shares that his teenage daughter is pregnant, and he feels he has failed as a parent.
Part of him blames his wife, whom he believes has been far too lenient with their daughter. Now the family is planning a baby shower. He is against the idea because he feels it sends the wrong message to their two younger daughters.
Reaching out to The Best T in the City with Tbose, Anonymous wants to know whether there are any blind spots he may be overlooking.
“My 16-year-old daughter is pregnant, and from the moment she told us… I stopped talking to her. I know that sounds harsh, but l’m hurt. Deeply. When she was in grade 8, she started showing signs of rebellion. I told my wife we needed to intervene early, even suggested putting her on family planning, but my wife kept saying, “She’s just a child going through a phase.” But things only got worse. She started going out, coming home late, and every time I tried to discipline her, her mother would defend her. I felt unsupported as a parent.
“Now she’s pregnant, due early next year, and what has angered me the most is seeing my wife planning a baby shower like it’s something to celebrate. I told her it’s wrong, that it feels like we’re condoning everything. But everyone, including my own mother, thinks I should forgive and soften up. They want to host the baby shower at our home, and I refused. Not when we have two younger daughters, 13 and 9. I don’t want them thinking teenage pregnancy is something you celebrate, or that there are no consequences. I’ve also made it clear that they will not be part of it.
“Now the whole house is divided. My wife barely speaks to me. My daughter avoids me. The youngest two are also acting differently towards me. Even my mother says I’m being too hard.
“The truth? I’m not trying to be the villain. I’m scared. Scared for her future. Scared for the baby. I feel like I failed her for not being the one to discipline her. I lie awake angry, but beneath the anger is fear, confusion, and guilt – both for what she did and for how I’m reacting. I don’t know how to move forward. I don’t know how to talk to her without exploding. And at the same time, I don’t want to abandon my daughter when she probably needs me now more than ever. Uncle T, how do I go on? How do I show love while I’m still this angry? And how do I protect my younger daughters, without losing the one who needs me the most right now?”
To hear the full blind spot, listen to the podcast.
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The post ‘My teenage daughter is pregnant, but I’m too angry to talk to her’ – The Blind Spot appeared first on KAYA 959.
