The internet has been flooded with the “exposing my DL” trend that began on TikTok, and while it’s somewhat entertaining to see the petty beef, it’s incredibly stupid and could have dire consequences.
I love my community with my full chest, but TikTok gays are not exactly the most aware group of people on the internet. From the queer TikToker who outed a CEO to Millie Bobby Brown being secretly homophobic, TikTok is riddled with ammunition for boomers and bigots to use against us. The most recent example is the exposing my DL trend – we really are our own worst enemy.
Credit: TikTok
What is the exposing my DL trend?
You proboably already know what a DL man is, but just in case, the letters stand for down-low. The term was born in Black communities in America, where seemingly heterosexual young men would sleep with other men on the down-low. It spread from there to become a more generic term, regardless of race or gender, and now most queer people have had at least some kind of experience with down-low men.
So, now onto the trend. As you can proboably tell from the name alone, TikTokers are exposing their DL men in front of the entire world. Sometimes it’s simply a picture or a name, but other times it’s information that you could argue is doxxing.
For obvious reasons, the videos are not included in this article.
Credit: TikTok
I’m sorry to be a party pooper, but it needs to stop
There are so many issues with the exposing my DL trend on TikTok, but let’s start with with a brutal truth: Most people know what they’re getting into. Down low men are not only a consistent thing in queer culture, but an unfortunate character development moment for gay people. We’ve all been there, and while there are some exceptions to the rule, at some point you would have learned that the man you’re seeing is down-low. You entered into that inherently toxic relationship of your own volition, so who are you to expose them as part of a viral internet trend?
And here’s the kicker: Outing someone, regardless of the context or their own personal moral infractions, is never – and I mean never – okay. Not only do you potentially expose that person to risk, but yourself as well. You don’t know how they’re going to react, or the people around them.
So next time a DL man slides into your Grindr messages, you’ve got two options: Either accept the type of relationship you’re entering into, warts and all, or move on to the next fish in the sea. The third option is not posting them on TikTok for clout, in case that wasn’t clear.
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Featured image credit: TikTok
