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What did Ed Gein know, and when did he know it?

The first of two Giants-Eagles matchups this season will happening under a Thursday Night spotlight.

She had the surgery six years ago

You will definitely have seen her in some huge Netflix shows

'We discussed every murder we ever heard about'

SEVERAL months of ridiculous hype later, 19 Celebrity Traitors are standing in a cemetery while host Claudia Winkleman tries to set the scene for the first challenge.

“Behind me,” she explains, in full Addams Family mode, “Each of you has your own grave, ready for your potential demise.

BBC

Race-baiting historian Professor David Olusoga is so tortured by the thought of slavery and colonialism, he can barely bring himself to look at the wealth it created[/caption]

PA

The Celebrity Traitors is still set to become a huge hit[/caption]

BBC

Host Claudia Winkleman standing in a cemetery as she sets the scene for the first challenge, where the 19 celebs will dig their graves to find immunity shields[/caption]

“Some would say creepy. I would say fun.”

And I would say “grievously misleading,” given “Charlotte Church,” “Paloma Faith,” “Professor David Olusoga,” “Tom Daley,” “Joe Marler” and “Clare Balding” are just some of the names carved into those headstones.

It looks like the graveyard of the irritants, in fact, the place where arse-aches go to die.

Yet, cruelly, there’s not a hint of real physical or professional jeopardy about The Celebrity Traitors which, much like the civilian version, strikes me as a triumph of scenery and production over a glorified game of Blink Murder.

Nearly ruined series

Indeed, the only significant difference here is the famous cast, who’ve brought with them a level of egomania that’s so vast it seems to dwarf the Highlands and cause the castle’s walls to close in on themselves.

How vast exactly?

Well, Tom Daley got the ball rolling by describing himself as a “wholesome guy”.

Clare Balding then compared herself to a lovable friendly “labrador,” before “lovely mum” Paloma Faith topped the lot of them by turning up, without a hint of irony, in an “I love me” baseball cap.

Some of the celebs were slightly subtler about it, admittedly, like freshly knighted Stephen Fry, who stood by a suit of armour until someone made the obvious comparison, and race-baiting historian Professor David Olusoga, who believes his job involves: “Making other people look at the world the way I look at the world.” Or, to put it another way, bending them to his obsessive, iron political will.

Other Celebrity Traitors, like Mark Bonnar, Joe Wilkinson and Celia Imrie, aren’t as obviously full of themselves as Paloma or as sinister and objectionable as the professor.

If you think they’ve all gone to Scotland for the sheer love of the show, though, I should also point out there is a flat £40,000 appearance for everyone involved and nothing celebrities, such as Clare, love more than attaching themselves to a hugely successful show like The Traitors.

They’ll get their wish as well, which will do nothing to help the ego issue.

But then nor will the dreadful air of sycophancy that hangs around the first episode and seems to be largely driven by a creep called Niko Omilana who, if he wasn’t telling Mark and Celia, “You two are world-class actors,” was assuring Tom, “That’s why you have a gold medal.” 

How Niko fits the description “celebrity,” and why the production team ever thought it needed a resident fluffer, I’ve no idea. But he’s added nothing to the show or the game itself, which got off to a hit and miss start with its choice of Traitors.

Jonathan Ross and Cat Burns both seemed like reasonable enough selections, by Claudia.

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The problem with Alan Carr is that he never stops performing and has such a hideous car alarm voice that he’d nearly ruined the series by episode one[/caption]

BBC

Jonathan Ross seems like a reasonable enough selection, by Claudia[/caption]

BBC

Charlotte Church digging her own grave to find immunity shields[/caption]

The problem with the third, Alan Carr, is that he never stops performing or projecting and has such a hideous car-alarm voice that he’d nearly ruined the whole series by the end of episode one.

None of which will probably stop The Celebrity Traitors becoming a huge hit or me from watching.

Because the promising thing about this series is that it’s more revealing than the celebs probably hoped, as you saw when Stephen Fry was crushed by the realisation he’s not as smart as Nick Mohammed, and a grief-stricken Clare Balding thought she’d shortened her stay with a brain fart during the Trojan Horse challenge.

What’s even more revealing, though, is the very presence of Professor David Olusoga who’s built a TV career tut-tutting his way round old estates with links to the slave trade.

A man so tortured by the thought of slavery and colonialism, he can barely bring himself to look at the wealth it created.

Yet here he is, without an apparent care in the world, on an estate that once belonged to the first Duke of Sutherland, George Granville Leveson-Gower, a figure hated in the area for his role in the infamous Highland Clearances which ripped the heart out of Scotland and was, of course, partly funded by his wife’s family’s connections to slave plantations in Jamaica.

Enjoy your 40 grand, Dave.

UNEXPECTED MORONS IN BAGGING AREA

THE Weakest Link, Romesh Ranganathan: “The word ‘ciao’, used to say goodbye, is borrowed from what European language?”

Sally ‘Traffic’ Boazman: “Chinese.”

The Chase, Bradley Walsh: “What animal features in van Dyck’s Equestrian Portrait of Charles I?”

Mike: “A duck.”

And Bradley Walsh: “Complete the well-known phrase, ‘Can’t see the wood for the . . . ?”

Alex: “Days.”

RANDOM TV IRRITATIONS

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EastEnders imagined prisoners like Ben Mitchell to be allowed out on compassionate pub visits[/caption]

EASTENDERS imagining prisoners, like Ben Mitchell, are allowed out on compassionate pub visits. Zack’s miracle recovery on BBC1’s Nine Bodies In A Mexican Morgue.

The wokest-ever Big Brother humiliating Caroline for ex- pressing a belief in biological sex.

And GMB’s horribly disingenuous host Kate Garraway, the morning after the Manchester synagogue outrage, claiming: “We still don’t know the motivation and the religion of the person named for the attack.”

Jihad Al-Shamie?

What are you thinking, Kate? Seventh-day Adventist?

BEEB IN SORRY STATE

WITH crushing inevitability, in the direct aftermath of the Manchester synagogue attack, Beeb reporter Sean Dilley and many of his colleagues very earnestly declared: “Speculation is something we don’t do on BBC News.”

A characteristically high-minded idea, from our state broadcaster.

It’s not true, though, is it. Their Westminster team speculate every day of the year and other reporters are at it all the time, as well.

On October 17, 2023, for instance, following an explosion at the Al-Ahli hospital in Gaza, which killed hundreds of people, BBC News reporter Jon Donnison feverishly speculated that: “It’s hard to see what else this could be, given the size of the explosion, other than an Israeli air strike, or several air strikes.

“The numbers and pictures speak for themselves.”

Except, they didn’t and as independent military experts, other sections of the media and Human Rights Watch quickly discovered, the most likely cause of the devastation was a misfiring rocket launched by Islamic Jihad, leading to a grovelling BBC apology.

As we saw last week, what the BBC absolutely won’t do, though, is speculate when the very obvious cause of a terrorist outrage is yet another Islamist psychopath.

With the very reproachful hint, from Auntie, being that the rest of the country should put its fingers in its ears and play dumb as well.

Why?

Well, I’ll leave you to speculate.

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QUIZ show answer of the week. The Weakest Link, Romesh Ranganathan: “What D is the term for a male duck?”

Tony Blackburn: “Duckette.”

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LOOKALIKE OF THE WEEK

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Sarah Mullally, left, and ­Tristram Fourmile from the unforgettable George & Mildred, right[/caption]

THIS week’s winner is Sarah Mullally, the new Archbishop of Canterbury, and ­Tristram Fourmile from the unforgettable George & Mildred.

Sent in by Paul Burkett, of Millwall, South East London.

GREAT SPORTING INSIGHTS

RUBEN AMORIM: “A big team are always a big team, in ­certain moments . . . Sometimes.”

Chris Sutton: “It’s going to be an interesting second first 45 minutes.”

And Joe Cole: “As favourites, Chelsea have to be favourites.”

(Compiled by Graham Wray)

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HOW Are You? It’s Alan (Partridge).

Bored, slightly listless, vaguely pleased to see ­sidekick Simon, but more than a bit wistful and pining for the days when Armando ­Iannucci wrote your scripts, thanks for asking.

FOR all those cynics who thought Charlotte Church was just another ego-driven, left-wing, empty-headed celebrity smug-bucket, as her reaction to the shield retrieval task on The Traitors proved, she’s not.

“I want to acquaint myself with the Scottish soil. I want to be as sensory as I can and to get sort of intimate with the earth and be able to feel out the shield and chain.”

She’s gratingly pretentious as well.

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TV GOLD

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BBC2 repeated Butch ­Cassidy And The Sundance Kid in honour of Robert Redford[/caption]

A CHILLING and award-worthy 24 Hours In Police Custody ­double header, on Channel 4.

The charming menace ­Charlie Maher brings to the role of ­villain Fogerty in BBC1’s superb Blue Lights.

Strictly’s wardrobe department having the time of its life with Stefan Dennis and Ross King, who’s worn an ankle-length fur coat and a kilt ­(Liberace Macpherson).

BBC2 repeating Butch ­Cassidy And The Sundance Kid in honour of Robert Redford. And ­Paramount+ having the balls to screen the heartbreakingly ­brilliant October 7 drama Red Alert.

Because, shamefully, no mainstream British channel had the courage or inclination to mark this week’s second ­anniversary of the pogrom with anything other than perfunctory news reports.

ENGLAND striker OIlie Watkins has been withdrawn at half-time after avoiding a potential horror injury.

The Aston Villa forward clattered into the woodwork in the 39th minute after trying to poke a pass home at the back post.

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Ollie Watkins collided heavily with the post[/caption]

Alamy

The injury initially appeared to be serious[/caption]

The 29-year-old stayed alarmingly down in what appeared to be a serious injury to his leg, but ended up limping his way through the rest of the first half.

THIS IS A DEVELOPING STORY..

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